10:54 pm

im usually in bed by now. but icant sleeep.
somethins on my mind........eeehhh.

actually more than one somethin.
idk theres no point in lying to myself about stuff like this.
saying its gonna be alright when iknow it wont.
when itell myself things will go back to the way they were.
when ikno they wont.
things are changing. and that seems to be thee only thing happening.
its just affecting me personally. and icant say ilike em too much.
changes from lik me getting older to losing friends that ihave.
and ithink thats the worst of all. ive been dissapointed alot lately..
and ihonestly feel iam a good enough friend not to be let down.
but things happen..and im gonna fix it bec ikno iwas at fault for nothing.
thats another thing..always having to be the one to fix the problem that inever caused..
ughldkhgklaj....

idk where im getting at here..
my minds just going crazy.
idont like liking someone. idont like having to worry about someone.
idont lik it. but it seems its gonna happen sooner than later.
but idont want it to.. idont want another dissapointment.
and sadly the one person who ithought was different from the others has proven me wrong.
hes the same. same same same :/
fuck all that.

iguess ill go back to just worrying about me.